Valentine’s Day for the Disaffected

Zoe Plattner

Chocolate, wine and roses are nice, but it’s 2020 and a new decade calls for a new tradition.
For those sick and tired of heart-shaped candies and raspberry flavors, here are some wacky ways to show your special someone a little love this February.

OK Boomer
Three drag stars square off in this multi-generational dating show as they compete for the heart of “boomer” drag queen Mark “Mom” Finley. In the performance, the Gen Z competitors will face a mix of lip-synch and teamwork challenges in their quest for supremacy. Hosted by Heavy Scene Macaque, other special guests include Sir Killer Bunny, Troia Prince and Kenze Kardashian. The show is 21-and-up, so Gen Z fans are exempt from enjoying the performance of their peers.
WHEN: Feb 7, 8 p.m.
WHERE: The Timbre Room
PRICE: $7 advance/$10 door

Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em Valentine’s Day Dash
Spread your love of running at this 5K, 10K, or half-marathon event (the choice is up to you).
Come as an individual or a two-person team to walk or run around Seattle’s Green Lake park. All participants will receive a custom Love ‘Em or Leave ‘Em shirt and bib number inscribed with a relationship status of their choice, and all finishers will be awarded a medal bearing a different design depending on the run they picked.
The event will feature a costume contest, tunnel of love, 20 exhibitor booths and — for those 21 and older — the Lover’s Lounge, which will serve a variety of adult beverages.
Registration and packet pickup begins 7:30 a.m., with the run kicking off at 9 a.m.. All proceeds will support the Green Lake Chamber of Commerce.
WHEN: Feb. 8, 7:30 a.m.
WHERE: Green Lake park
PRICE: $35-$90

Valentine’s Puppy Mixer
Looking for love and puppies? This 21-and-up event is a great way to meet your next best friend, be it a human or a dog.
Activities include puppy speed dating (aka “adopt-a-puppy”), biped speed networking (aka human speed dating with puppies) and drinks for all who want them. Sign up for the event online at facebook.com/events/770056963472500
WHEN: Feb 9, 3-8 p.m.
WHERE: Hellbent Brewing Company
PRICE: Free

The Atomic Bombshells in… J’adore! A Burlesque Valentine
For something a little spicier, don’t miss the 12th anniversary season performance of the Atomic Bombshells’ hit show, J’adore!.
This group of globe-trotting burlesque performers will be yet again treating Seattle to a glamorous performance that leaves nothing to the imagination. Dance, drag and humor are included. Tickets are reserved for those 17 and older.
WHEN: Feb. 13-16, 7 p.m.
WHERE: The Triple Door
PRICE: $28-$45

Boy Band vs Girl Group Sing-Along: Dream Date Edition
Belt your heart out with your pop star crush in this boy band and girl group sing-along. Bring your buddies and dance the night away to tunes from some of the hottest artists in popular music.
WHEN: Feb. 13, 8 p.m.
WHERE: Central Cinema
PRICE: $12 advance/$14 door

Galentine’s Day: Bingo Soiree
Win some fabulous prizes and celebrate friendship with your gal pals — and alcohol.
Physical challenges, “name that tune” and trivia games will ensue, as well as bubbly drinks and plenty of treats from local vendors.
Prepare to play six rounds of bingo with a chance at top prizes including a gift certificate for dinner at Canlis. Tickets include bingo, desserts and a welcome cocktail. Attendees must be 21 and older.
WHEN: Feb. 13, 6:30-10 p.m.
WHERE: The Collective
PRICE: $28